It's been a slow month in Toledo, Ohio, my hometown. The children? Average, mostly. Also, I have it on good authority that there are men in lipstick shoving things into their urethras. In my neighborhood, if not in my apartment.
If you love me, buy my book Write to Oprah about it. Buy my book and send it to Oprah. Mama needs a pony.
In other news, I went to Chicago and had a really cool first date at what turned out to be a Latina tranny hooker bar. I saw naked boobies there. Naked boobies not envisioned by nature. I also rode the ferris wheel at Navy Pier and had catfish at Wishbone. I would live at Wishbone if I lived in Chicago.
They'd let me install a cot in the mens' room, right?
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
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